Wednesday, July 11, 2007

How To Remove Warts

My Mother could remove warts, but unfortunately I'm not permitted to disclose her method due to family tradition, however, there are other methods for those not privy to such information.

According to Mark Twain:"You got to go all by yourself, to the middle of the woods, where you know there's a spunk-water stump, and just as it's midnight you back up against the stump and jam your hand in and say:'Barley-corn, barley-corn, injun-meal shorts, Spunk-water, spunk-water, swaller these warts,'and then walk away quick, eleven steps, with your eyes shut, and then turn around three times and walk home without speaking to anybody. Because if you speak the charm's busted."

But seriously, warts respond to being soaked in acid over a period of time. That is why the vinegar and aspirin cures work. Seems silly to me that someone would go to the drugstore and buy aspirin to cure a wart rather than buy the liquid that is designed to remove them. The active ingredient in wart remover is salicylic acid, which is aspirin. It is in an alcohol and ether suspension so that the liquid will dry and stick to the wart.

What they don't tell you on the bottle is the usage of duct tape. Basically you apply the liquid, allow it to dry, and then cover the area with duct tape. In a few days, remove the tape. Scrape the dead skin with a sterile razor blade. If there is anything left of the wart re treat with the liquid and reapply the duct tape. Repeat the process until the wart is completely gone. Essentially, the key is to keep treating.

If you don't remove the entire wart to the core it will come back.I am sure that you could use vinegar, lemon juice, vitamin c, an aspirin tablet, or anything else acidic. Another course of action is Castor oil, a paste made from crushed vitamin C tablets and water, or a moist aspirin tablet (held in place with a band-aid) .

Comments on "How To Remove Warts"


Blogger dd089966 said ... (7:38 AM) : 

I came up with a better idea of my own to be honest. I once had a wart on my right thumb (on the side to the right) right above the middle joint when I was probably around 15 years old or so. So, after figuring out that warts don't go away by simply cutting the bump off with scissors I proceeded to get pissed off and say fuck this, essentially.

What I ended up doing was getting scissors, and cutting the top off again, but me being the type of guy I am, tore away at my flesh with my nails and took away pieces one by one. The flesh wasn't normal in any sense that flesh should be. It reminded me of sunflower kernels or something or that nature, spreading out from the core, being thinnest at the bottom and thickest nearer to the surface of the skin.

I ended up tearing quite a bit of the kernels and finally got to the middle and did the same thing. Snip with nail, then tear out. The hole was freakin' huge and disgusting, but it healed up perfectly after probably about a week or so.

Oddly enough, I ended up with the healing abilities of a wart where the wart is supposed to be at and its super thick skin, BUT it gets better. I still have my nerve endings there, and it feels perfectly normal. The only difference you can tell that is noticeable to the naked eye is that affected area's skin color is ever so slightly more yellow than the rest of my skin, but that's it.

Yeah, I didn't use any pain killers or anything, and it hurt like hell. However, you cannot argue with the efficiency about it. Once you boil it down to how well it works; that's all that matters to me.

No, I ahr nawt /b/ crazy either. It's just I have an alright pain tolerance, and can understand the concept that pain is there to tell you something is wrong. Once you figure that out - it doesn't nearly hurt as bad. It's like sex for the first time and being on the short end of the stick. Really sucks and a lot of your body is saying "what the fuck?!", even though you kind of sort of know better than to freak the fuck out.

Just my two cents.

Also, is your family secret banana peels and tape by chance? :)


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