Wednesday, March 05, 2008
Tuesday, March 04, 2008
You Don't Know Jack Schitt
|For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt? We find ourselves at a loss when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt!" Well, thanks to my genealogy efforts, you can now respond in an intellectual way|
Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc. They had one son, Jack.
In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The deeply religious couple produced six children: Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt.
Against her parents' objections, Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout.
After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later married Ted Sherlock, and because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe Schitt Sherlock.
Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they produced a son with a rather nervous disposition named Chicken Schitt. Two of the other six children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt were in separable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony. The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens nuptials, The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Horse.
Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.
NOW..... When someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt," you can correct them.
Crock O. Schitt
|Well, it appears our African-American friends have found yet something else to be pissed about. A black congresswoman, from Florida , has complained that the names of hurricanes are all Caucasian sounding names. |
She would prefer some names that reflect African-American culture such as Chamiqua, Tanisha, Woeisha, Shaqueal, and Jamal. I am NOT making this up!
She would also like the weather reports to be broadcast in Language that street people can understand because one of the problems that happened in New Orleans was, that black people couldn't understand the seriousness of the situation, due to the racially biased language of the weather report.
I can hear it now: A weatherman in Miami and Tampa says...
Wazzup, mutha-fukkas! Hehr-i-cane Chamiqua be
headin' fo' yo ass like Le roy on a crotch rocket!
Bitch be a category fo'! So grab yo' chirren, yo'
Ho, be leavin yo crib, and head fo' da nearest
guv'ment office fo yo FREE shit!